4. Maybe It’s Because I Eat?

So, yesterday I made the ridiculous decision to punish myself unnecessarily, and watch the Victoria’s Secret fashion show: Holy beautiful women. Those costumes! Those shoes! That hair! Those… Tits! (I know everyone was thinking it…)

Now, I am a fairly normal human being  — I use the words ‘normal’ & ‘human’ rather loosely — so I of course had some hangups about my physical appearance BEFORE watching the show; after watching it I just wanted to crawl outside my body and find a place to die. Or, begin throwing up after every meal.

I figured that separating myself from my body was too much work with little reward, & I decided that I didn’t have the guts or the determination to have an eating disorder, but while I was mentally wrestling with myself over the issue of my weight it got me thinking…. Am I single because I am not thin, slim, slender, willowy, svelte, slight and/or waif-like?

I am by no means a greek goddess, but I would still consider myself a decent looking girl both inside and out. I am not the slimmest girl in the world, but by no means would anyone confuse me with some sort of ocean dwelling mammal, HOWEVER, regardless of what I look like there is no way that I will live up to the standard of a VS model. Or any model for that matter. They possess an unattainable beauty that was blessed upon them by luck and fantastic genes. Yet, this image of unattainable beauty is being blasted via the media through every visual outlet companies can get their hands on. Billboards, commercials, print advertisements in magazines and newspapers… They may use different models and be attempting to sell different products, but at the end of the day all these models look the same, and the message being portrayed is no different: in order for a woman to be beautiful she must be thin.

If I need to slim down to land a man, I might actually be alone forever.

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