38. Maybe it’s my temper?

I am regrettably quick to anger. Lately, I have been especially temperamental: my rage is out of CONTROL. Two days ago I told my coworker to go fuck himself… Because he asked me a question.

He tried to start a conversation with me, and I responded with something that can be described as minor hostility.

apologized, of course… But sorry only goes so far.

I wish I could say that he was my only victim… But as of late my temper has been flaring up at any and all humans who even THINK of something that MIGHT slightly irritate me.

My poor mother doesn’t even know what to do with me… I slammed a door in her general direction (never in her face… That would be rude. There’s a line, people.) Why? Because she gave me a compliment…

And anyone that I work with has recently been giving me an especially wide berth — another co-worker asked me a question about an uncharacteristically prominent zit on my chin, and she was blasted with a slew of insults that are probably even too inappropriate for the internet.

Sorry. My bad.

So, maybe I have my occassional negativity, mixed with my proclivity for tantrums and emotional outbursts, snits, hissy fits, fits of temper, fits of rage, and just fits in general to blame for being single.

My temper has always been relatively volatile, but now it’s borderline volcanic. A bad temper, plus my passive-aggressive tendencies (which I won’t even START to get in to today), does not make me girlfriend material.

On another note, my BFF is leaving on a jet plane today, and I don’t think that she will ever be back again. BUT, she is flying across the country to pursue — and most likely achieve — her dream. & I couldn’t be prouder of her.

She’s gonna be a SUPERSTAR.

As ya’ll are reading this, I am probably bawling my eyes out because I am alone in my bedroom, snuggling Bob and running a train on a tub of Ben & Jerry’s. Am I heartbroken? OF COURSE. I am going to miss that girl like crazy. But I would rather have my BFF 3464.7 kilometres away and happily chasing her dream, than right next to me, not utilizing her amazing talents and always wondering if she could have made it in the business.

Good luck BFF, and safe travels. You’re going to be great… & you’ll always know where to find me when you need me. <3

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