42. Maybe it’s because I’m (almost) unemployed?

Ugh, I am so sorry for the lack of blog post last Sunday… But my life is currently falling apart — more so than usual.

I found out earlier this week that my current status of being employed with a decent job that pays me a more than decent wage is going to cease come September 5. Read: as of the fifth of September I am going to be unemployed for the first time in SIX YEARS.

That is a long time to be working for a single company… And it was more than long enough for me to gain tons of very specialized experience & get more comfortable than is socially acceptable in a place of employment.

My impending unemployment is a little bit stressful.

I am FREAKING out. Kind of. I am undulating wildly between losing my mind with worry & being totally serene. It’s all very emotionally taxing and confusing, but at the same time I feel like maybe, just maybe, I needed this. I needed to be shoved in this direction.

Knowing that my time at the company I work for is rapidly coming to a close has allowed me to be honest with myself about how I really feel about working there: I am not entirely happy. The terms of my employment there and the terms of my lifestyle don’t effectively mesh; that job just isn’t a good fit for me. I am artsy and liberal; my current job is boring and conservative… my boss’ favourite adjective is “compliant.”

Yuck.

No matter how jarring & unexpected, change is always a positive thing… even if currently it doesn’t feel like it, I know that this moment and the many following it are going to be very important in setting me on a better, more positive, more appropriate path in my life.

The unfortunate part of it all is that until I gain some sort of employment I am officially even MORE undesirable as a mate than ever before. Who wants a girl who isn’t even slightly contributing to society? My financial situation is already precarious, not having a steady income is really going to push it over the edge.

I will probably have to sell my car. And stop buying brand-name goods… and brand-name foods. I will actually probably have to stop buying food in general…

I should also get ready to beg for more student loan money from the government. Do you think there is an educational grant for soon-to-be unemployed university students?

So, my search for a man is going to have to put on hold whilst I am searching for a job…. Girl’s gotta eat, right?

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