51. Maybe it’s because I wear Uggs?

Ugg boots are the crown jewel of any girl’s fall/winter wardrobe.

The boots are a symbol of style & status, and they are ESSENTIAL to surviving brutal weather if you intend to keep your  trendy rep intact (as I intend to do).

There are few things I love more than sliding into the sheepskin sheaths of my Uggs on a crisp fall day. Living in a climate where 9 months out of the year are miserably cold, it’s pure bliss to have footwear that I find fashionable, comfortable and oh-so-toasty warm.

I LOVE my Uggs. The way that I feel when my feet are firmly snuggled in my Ugg boots is rivaled only by acts of physical intimacy I would really prefer NOT to share — all ya’ll need to know is that Uggs are awesome.

HOWEVER, I’ve become concerned that the affection that I feel for my Uggs is not universal: there are a lot of Ugg-haters out there, & in my personal experience those haters are predominantly male. I don’t mean to generalize, but I have had significantly more boys tell me my boots are disgusting, and that has led me to the conclusion that my fabulous footwear is preventing dudes from asking me out.

Logical, right?

Could it be that my affection, fondness, endearment, unnatural attachment, &/or  tendency to wear popular Australian footwear on a regular basis throughout the fall/winter months is deterring men from speaking to me?

Yeah… No.

When women catch a glimpse of my boots they gush over them; when men see them they usually cringe… or just pretend that anything below my knees doesn’t exist.

But, I am not entirely sure that I can draw a positive correlation betwixt my devotion to expensive sheep skin boots and the fact that no one wants to be with me.

You see, I was actually informed by a male of the human species that Ugg boots wouldn’t prevent him from hitting on a female. They are just shoes, after all. How much impact can they have on the opposite sex, really?

As much as I doubt the persuasive powers of Ugg boots when it comes to attracting the eye of an eligible mate, I think it would be fallacious to make the leap & assume that my comfortable, cozy, and fashion-forward footwear is the root of my single woes. Which has both positive & negative implications for me: I can continue to wear my beautiful boots & not worry that I am ruining my chances of mating for life, BUT this revelation also means that there is something else terribly wrong with me that is keeping me forever alone.

& I am not quite sure what that is. So, the search continues.

By the way, Happy Thanksgiving to all you Canadians out there! Enjoy your turkey (or other meatless substitute) this weekend: gobble, gobble, and all that other garbage.


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