I was grocery shopping the other day… well, no, more aptly I was in the grocery store the other day, picking up a few necessities for a friend’s birthday party, when I spotted the most gorgeous human being I have ever seen in real life.
He was so handsome… I had difficulty looking directly at him.
He was tall, athletic, probably around his mid-20s, and, although I nervously scuttled away from him upon first sighting, fate decided to place him ahead of me in the express checkout. Which was cool & everything, & I would have really appreciated it, but I think what fate intended as a kind gesture turned into more of a cruel joke.
You see, Mr. Handsome was ringing through a carton of organic milk, a freshly made salad, a pair of apples, & some fucking quinoa. Meanwhile, I have my hands full with a couple family-size bags of chips, two litres of Clamato, & a Hershey’s chocolate bar. I look at his groceries, look at my “groceries,” & it is blatantly obvious that we are in totally different places in our lives.
He has matured from eating chips for dinner & downing a whole bottle of wine in one sitting, whereas I am still barely eating three meals a day — one of them probably consisting of beer & very little else.
This got me thinking: maybe the fact that I am a 24 year-old woman behaving like an 18 year-old girl has got something to do with my lack of relationship prospects. The dudes that I want to be with have grown out of their partying phase, so why haven’t I? I mean, yeah, I am living the student lifestyle: broke, depressed, and stressed on the reg’ but that doesn’t mean I have to add alcoholism to my growing list of things wrong with me.
I had my party girl period, & that obviously did not leave my life ripe with healthy male attention, so perhaps I need to shift gears socially. Maybe if I matured, grew up, & actually acted my age, I would be able to capitalize on the handsome strangers fate throws my way.